DEAR ABBY: I am sad that I haven’t found a long-lasting husband. I’m divorced, and my previous relationships and marriage look like intentional hits. I’m not sure what brought this on. I’m in my 40s and I still would like a man in my life. The men I’ve met all seem to enjoy having their homes to themselves. It’s kind of frightening.
Some female friends have told me that the good ones are already taken, so I’m waiting for a divorce to happen. Should I try online dating? Do you think I should reach out to another state for someone? — IMPATIENT IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR IMPATIENT: Stop waiting for a divorce to “happen” — those men have been burned and aren’t likely to be candidates for marriage in the near future. Because an increasing number of matches are made via online dating sites, write a profile and post it on a couple that cater to mature adults, preferably who live relatively close by. If you meet someone, take things slowly and you may have better luck.
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DEAR ABBY: Is it possible to lose your sense of humor because of a stroke? Before it happened, my dear sister was witty, fun-loving and the life of the party. She has recovered physically, but she no longer has a sense of humor. Everything is deadly serious to her now, and she doesn’t understand when someone is making a joke. I want her to “lighten up,” but I’m afraid this might be a result of her brain injury. Any insight? — LAUGHING BY MYSELF
DEAR LAUGHING: What you have described could absolutely be related to your sister’s stroke. When it happened, certain areas of her brain were “disconnected.” This isn’t her fault, and telling her to “lighten up” will not improve the situation. Thank your higher power that she has recovered physically, keep your comments direct and literal, limit the jokes and you will both be more comfortable.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.